Welcome to the Man Cave 2.0 BETA! Last update Jan 17 2020


While the old reviews are still here I've taken my own advice to heart. Most music hardware is garbage and I would be better off without it covering every horizontal surface etc. Look for the happy SOLD IT signs.


I've also reached a point where I can answer the big question - is music hardware in some way better than software? More authentic? More real? HELL NO! It's the sound that matters and I don't give a toss about 80's retro burps - I want to work in music concrete and deep fake sounds and spectral disintegration - and that stuff is all software.


So you're going to see a lot more software reviews - but don't worry I'm equally cruel to virtual bullshit.




The original welcome 2016


Ladies and Gentlemen, when one has progressed in years it is allowed to develop some vice for companionship. Not being particularly debauched, and having had experience with other people's drugs and difficult moods, I've chosen a harmless addiction to musical toys. But addiction is pointless unless you can inflict it on others, and I do that here.


Other people have far worse addictions than mine - I simultaneously scoff at the depths they have reached, while striving to catch up as soon as possible. I guarantee you that even if other people own more things I will be more entertaining about it.


Actually, as near everything here was bought with money made by selling music, I feel completely justified in having it, and as much more as I can possibly cram into the void of existence.


This site also provides a public service in that my opinion is always right and worth knowing. I'll make sure to mention other people who are also correct, and mock everyone else.


When you own lots of synthesisers, it's important to put them all in a room which filled with inspiring crap. I'll point out some of this crap for you. If you manage to become inspired, that's good too.

"A MAN CAVE? Are you some sort of chauvinistic un-woke male dominant cisperson?"


Well, actually, no.

I'm a musician that found some extra space in their home, and decided it would be amusing to act out the 'man cave' filled with 'man things'.

In my case it was electronic music gear.


The catalyst was a magazine that wanted to do an interview. 'We'll send around a photographer to take a photo of you standing in front of your gear!'. When I pointed out that there was no gear for me to stand in front of - they never called back. Seriously.


I've been composing since the late 1970's. There's been gear, or no gear depending on life's realities. But fuck it, they want gear I'll give them gear. Piled up. Huge walls of fucking gear. But also I'll tell the truth about it – so much of what people lust for is complete bullshit.

Because you can't hear wood.